Horní Cerekev

During my four years of high school attendance I commuted daily so I spent countless hours sitting at bus or train stations. However, those hours spent in the waiting hall at the train station in Tábor brainwashed me. I clearly remember the voice in the loudspeakers announcing arrival of the train with its last stop in Horní Cerekev. I remember my friend and I trying to picture the mysterious place with so many trains having it as their destination. We promised ourselves we would one day go there and see it.

We finished our high school, managed to get even higher education and this year, after what seems like an eternity of not mentioning our goal, we finally set a date to get there.

I intentionally did not make any research prior to going there. I only googled where it was on the map and when I saw only 1700 residents occupied that locality I shut the computer down not trying to disappoint myself sooner than necessary.

Upon our embarking the very small local train an older man with apparent hangover got on asking us if this train went to a certain town. Since we only knew the final destination we were not sure and looked puzzled. He couldn’t understand our lack of knowledge saying he fell asleep in a candy shop (since when do candy shops have booze in stock?!) and now he was not sure he was on the right train. So weren’t we.

When the ticket collector took a look at our tickets, he asked us if we really went to Cerekev. We had to assure him that was our intention. The journey was long and after some while, when we were near our destination, I thought it would be better if I relieved my bladder since I was unsure of having the opportunity to do so elsewhere. This was my first time in this type of train so I was a little bit confused by all those buttons I had to push before entering the toilet area (where are the old school doorknobs when you need them?!) which got me to even more tricky situation (not unlike the situation from a dream every now and then I have when I’m sleeping with a full bladder) because as I turned around to close the door there was absolutely no button! I was futilely trying to find it to close the damned door so that the other passengers would stop looking at me! Oh, I was so close yet so far away from reaching my goal. Fortunately the conductor saw my struggle and told me to turn around and look for it near the mirror. I mean there, really? Not by the door but on the wall opposite to it? In a crooked universe it makes sense – as you enter you don’t have to turn around but still...

When we hopped off the train we did not know where to go since the station seemed to be positioned in the middle of nowhere. So as anyone who doesn’t have a clue we pretended to be absolutely certain and followed discreetly some random people hoping they would lead us toward the centre and not deeper in the forest.

I do not have to mention how everyone was turning their heads as we were passing by. Strange girls in a strange town, what a sensation! As we passed the post office, an urge to send postcards to our homes arose. Yup, but our window of opportunity to do so was only for four hours (before we had to catch a train home) and when do they have a lunch break there? Yup, you guessed right. So we headed into ice-cream shop/newsagents where they provided us with both stamps and postcards. The dude selling it to us was casting suspicious glances toward us not knowing why we chose this town for our trip.

We walked around the square and then reached one end of the town, so we turned back and looked at the other end. Still time to kill. So we decided to take a lunch break. So, the one pub near the square held deer hearts, pig liver and other gross stuff as their specialties so we decided to go to a 5 star hotel (what is such a big luxurious thing with beach volleyball and mini golf areas doing in the middle of nowhere?) and pay a decadent price for our lunches. The food was decadent as well. But in a really baaaaaad way. My friend’s vegetable couscous was tasteless, my pasta with salmon included cheap hard pasta (yup, al dente and cheap stuff don’t go together), very dry pieces of a once-frozen salmon with skin still attached (was it too daring from me to expect in a 5 star hotel surrounded by lakes to actually get a fresh yummy fish?!) and on the top of it all, there was some kind of sauce which reeked of raw potatoes. I mean, seriously?

Still time to kill. So, we decided to go to the town hall/museum/library/info center. The guy in the info centre, which is situated by the desk in the library, stared at us in wonder when we said we wanted to see the museum – the paper and plastic models of various stuff. He said women usually didn’t come there to see it, and then, after the first wave of shock disappeared, he willingly talked about the models (about one third was his doing anyway). When we were walking away, he asked us to take a pin and drive it into the map to pinpoint our hometown – he was curious how many pins and how far he would get with this. Another wave of shock came as he stared at my friend’s pin. She really lives that far away?! Omg, omg, omg, how is that possible? How did she get in this godforsaken place? We really had a blast.

To make a full circle, we went back to the place where the guy sold us the postcards. He couldn’t believe we were still there. So he sold us ice-creams and told us that we could have gone to the castle (it was locked for the public when we were wandering around) but the owner, a really old artist, usually let people in if they asked since he did not mind having company for a moment. Heck, he just couldn’t have said this piece of info before, could he?! I mean, a tour of the castle and a possible art exhibition? It could have been fun. But our time was running out and we walked to the station marveling at our weird unforgettable trip.

So, what to do next time? Take a dart and throw it at a map? We shall see...  

Oh, those culture days...

Every now and then I suppress my hatred for cities with their streets filled with too many tourists who take up all my personal space I value so much and give it a try. I have to - all the culture happens there so I must call my best friend and see all the cool exhibitions.

This time we could not wait to see Tim Burton’s stuff. Oh yeah, after watching Nightmare before Christmas over and over again since our teenage years (plus his other works, of course) we were almost ecstatic about the idea of pleasing our eyeballs even more with the genius of Burton’s crooked mind.

But to make it worthwhile, we decided to go to other exhibitions as well. So, ehm, here we go. Or rather there we went.

The first to visit was a some kind of culinary exhibition promising to lead us through the stages of kitchen development through time. Yup, it goes like this: the cavemen eating cadavers and other kind of gross stuff, then bam! the fire is not just for warming us up, then bam! the middle ages and bam! the kitchens out grandmas have then bam! unwanted advertisement rooms “cleverly” designed by some booze producers to elate a false feeling of history and them bam! up the stairs into a modern kitchen, history of Czech cuisine depictured on posters and yet another smug display of what to buy when it comes to cutlery. It was too short, too stupid and the fact that the guide (yup, not even a guide can lift your spirits) gave us a sample of boozeless mead probably infuriated me a little further. So unless you are threatened, don’t bother going to the Gastronomy Museum – it’s just a waste of your time and money.

Next, we went to the Choco Story Museum. With our mood so down after the first exhibition even a roadkill smeared with chocolate could have make us happy again so I had a feeling this would be awesome. That was BEFORE they made me pay an astrological entrance fee. After that I was determined to see this through entirely different eyes. My expectations were super high. Of course, this was even shorter, with a video anyone can probably find on youtube. It included a short demonstration of how to make chocolate candy – one of which was given to each of us which again, was good, but made us angry because ONE PIECE OF CANDY IS SIMPLY NOT ENOUGH! So we marched into the store of this museum and when we saw the prices we knew why just one candy. If you are a tourist and they tickle your taste buds with one piece of chocolate, you don’t know that the shop underneath is a trap. You are probably bad at comparing your currency with Crowns so you buy yourself a chocolate bar or something more and think you are finally satisfied while you totally made the evil person in charge of this museum happy. But after the Gastronomy Museum fail this seems more likely to entertain you.

Well, third time is a charm, right? Thank goodness for finally reaching what we wanted. Burton’s exhibition with its numerous rooms filled with beautiful drawings, films and 3D art ensured we finally found our little piece of optically-pleasing heaven. For this, I have no words, it was everything we expected and more.

And lastly, since there still was time to kill, we decided to take a look at Czech modern art – the lady who sold us the tickets told us to hurry, for the tour has already started. That seemed promising. Until we heard the guide. I mean, I get that you have to start somewhere when you are new but you should not let the others see your insecurity. You should definitely not look around the room trying to find the painting you are talking about (hint, you are standing right next to it, for god’s sake!), you should not mix up the artist’s names and you should not read those little notes on the wall next to each painting (we can read, we don’t need a “commented tour” for that!). So after this shock we tried to mentally shut down our ears and just read all those notes ourselves and strode out of the room in record time. The paintings were beautiful (I wish I could get closer look at Toyen but I just couldn’t bear it anymore).

Over all, it was a good day. I mean spending time with friends is always quality time no matter how shitty place you go to. At least there’s a lot to talk about and to remember, ‘cause let’s face it – I will remember the bad stuff longer than the good stuff.  

The Battle of Czech May Beauty Boxes 2

This time last year I wrote about three beauty boxes which appeared on the Czech market. Two of them joined forces and became one, the third disappeared completely. So, there is no comparing this time (only to the last year's issues). 

What I ordered then was Ladybox which swallowed Senzabox and now they act as one under the name of Ladybox. The same ugly pink box arrived filled with white paper worms which subsequently filled me with terror. Fortunately no hair popped out. My camera still refuses to give me some of the pictures I take so I only managed to take out this picture of the box's content:

1) Lavera mattifying balancing cream sample. Wow, what a flashback :-)= But I remember it smelled nice so I will use it at some point.

2) Bell Aloe Vera cotton pads. Aargh. Just when I decided to be more environmental friendly and bought myself washable pads, they send me this. Just great. It's a step back for me but they are useful at least.

3) Matcha chocolate. I don't like food in make-up boxes, however, I've ever wanted to try this matcha thing everyone has been so into lately so I am eager to try this out.

4) Ziaja olive micellar water. I've already had this one and must say it doesn't remove make-up well. It's ok with foundation but mascara is a no go for it.

5) Alva loose shadow in Soft and Gentle. I generally have problem with application of loose eyeshadows because they somehow fall all over my face. This color gives sublte shine and even though it looks like a skin tone, it's too light when applied and it makes my eyes look weird. I'll probably mix it with something else and see if I can find a use for it.

6) Xhekpon cream. This is something which promises one those anti-aging life-defying results. We shall see...

7) MeMeMe Beat the Blues in Pearl Pink. Now, finally something I've been trying to get my hands on for ages but haven't had the opportunity to do so. Can't wait to see how illuminated I'm gonna be! :-)=

I dunno but my overall impression of this box isn't nice. I was hoping to see something new (sure, Xhekpon is, but that's not very thrilling for my age group) and that was fulfilled by that chocolate which is not a normal thing to be in a beauty box. The only thing which I know will be used is the skin illuminator and that's it. Old, boring stuff anyone can get. 

You've gotten worse, Ladybox...

Doorknob Necklace Holder

Here's the thing. Whenever I am totally stressed out (yup, they make you feel like that twice a year at the university), somehow from the middle of nowhere my inner DIY genius emerges. My mind is immediately flooded by thousands of DIY projects I could do. And of course, since anything is better than studying, I do not feel like denying my inner DIY genius. 

Now that I am a blogger (oh yeah) I even think of taking step-by-step pictures of the stuff I create to share. However, my old (and now oficially senile) camera has forgotten to store my pictures in its memory so all I can show you is the result. 

But in case you are wondering how to do that:

1) scavenger hunt list: a piece of wood, two colors (red and white), sandpaper, drill, doorknobs, nails or anything for hanging it

2) measure where the holes would look appropriate and drill

3) after introducing the sandpaper to the wood, follow by applying red color

4) when it is all dry, the white color can be sprayed on it (three coats)

5) after drying, take the sandpaper again and just try to uncover the annual rings and basically fool around until you are satisfied with the outcome

6) one top coat of see-through paint and let it dry

7) screw in the doorknobs

8) get rid of the too long screws from the doorknobs at the back (yup, cut the excess off)

9) hang it on the wall

10) surprise your mom on Mother's Day

And this is how it looks like once my mom hang all her necklaces on it.

Rubber Ducky Frenzy 4

So, some time ago it was Christmas and my Birthday and this is the result :-D Can you see the Good Soldier Švejk ducky? How awesome is that?!

Poppy Z. Brite: Lost Souls

I haven’t read anything so cruel yet captivating in a long while. The book is one jaw-dropping maelstrom of blood, sex, addictive substances, violence, loneliness, madness and music.

It is not probably for the faint of heart but I can assure you there is nothing like it out there. Honestly, the author presents all those tabooish subjects with such ease that at the end you don’t mind the crazy vampire father sleeping with his own son. No, it’s somehow right in this world.

The vampires are a separate race; they procreate - creating a new generation which will claw its way out of their mother’s wombs; the oldest ones have retracting teeth and have strictly liquid diet and allergy to the sun, the younger having more benefits minus the cool fangs – they just file their teeth to look more like their forefathers; they can suck blood or just your essence etc. but the book is focused on a group of five blood drinkers – one lunatic Zillah with his two vagabond mates Twig and Molochai, one lonely weary Christian and Zillah’s newly found son Nothing.

We are taken on one hell of a trip to New Orleans and back home with two mortal musicians from the band called Lost Souls? - just because their music attracted a soon-to-be vampire who somehow attracted his long lost family and then all the hell broke loose.

The characters keep losing things – illusions, childhood, sanity, last link to humanity, lovers, lives – just name it. I could go on about how fascinating the novel is but I want you to go to your nearest bookshop and get a copy for yourself. Read it! I mean it – I have no idea how I spent twenty-five years of my life not knowing about this novel.

I think that to the bunch of classic vampires whom none of us will ever forget (Dracula, Carmilla, Lestat and Louis) one name will carve itself into the soft tissue of our mushy brains right next to them – Zillah the beautiful green-eyed monster.

No idea what I’m talking about? Never heard of him and don’t know why he should be in the vampire hall of fame? Just read it and you’ll understand! 

GENRE: crazy road trip whirlwind in your head

FANGS OUT: original
FANGS RETRACTING: ha, some characters wish they could slide ‘em in and out at will and not be bothered with razors
TOTAL SCORE:

Melted rainbow necklace holder

I've decided to make a hanger for my ever-growing collection of necklaces (damn you, cheap Ebay things from Asia!). At first I wanted to buy just a regular key holder or something like that (one long piece of wood with hooks in it) but then I decided to go the more difficult and artsy way.

And honestly, it would be a nice picture, too. Just use your imagination.

So, here's how I've done that:

 First, I obtained a base - you can use any type of wood, plastic etc. in any shape. It's up to you, really. What I have here is called OSB.

Then I bought a wooden frame - this particular one is used for framing floors, but who cares? It was the cheapest option and I didn't mind the thickness of it - my holder was gonna be huge so a thin picture frame wouldn't do anyway.

The next thing to do was to cut the frame. Beware of the pattern on the frame and cut it in a way it will fit once put together ;-)

Impatient people, people with dull saws or with no upper body strength will have to file the edges.

Try if your measuring was correct.

Now, next part is to glue the frame to its base. Since the glue takes a day to harden, you will need these to hold the frame to the base - no idea what these suckers are called.

Yeah, like that... There may be a chance of slight imperfections (or gigantic holes) where the two pieces of frame meet. In that case you have two options. Either let it be (like I did) or just fill the holes with some putty/paste or whatever they give you in the shop where they know what they are doing.

Now it's good time for dealing with your stress. Just hammer the nails in like there is no tomorrow ;-)

Matte black spray layer one drying...

Crayon test - how many will fit in?

Melting test (that should be done BEFORE you buy a gazillion packages of crayons) - a quick tip here - you need WAX based crayons.

Undress them - I know you want to!

Now here is a tricky part. Use a glue gun to pin the crayons to the base BUT put the glue only in the upper part of the crayon plus be precise - the glue melts the crayons so you don't want them to move aound much. (I had to break one white crayon because I decided to drill a hole through the base for easier hanging so naturally I didn't want the hook to be stopped by that crayon later when hanging it)

And now the melting begins. Be patient. I takes forever with a hair dryer. Also, you need to have the picure in some angle - letting the gravity to do its thing.

My idea of "I'm satisfied with how it turned out to be"

And now all you need to do is use it. And find out where you have gaps so that you can add more nails...